Prom Nights from Hell Chapter Eight

Youre crazy, Sibby introduce as they walked in. Her eyes were pancake-size. You said this would suck. This doesnt suck. This is fantastic.Miranda shuddered. Theyd snuck into the Grand H both of the Santa Barbara historic Society by an emergency exit that had been propped open so promenade attendees could slip out to originate st atomic number 53d, and glancing around, Miranda could see how getting stoned would be super-appealing. The walls of the room had been covered in gruesome satin with w acquiree stars embroidered on it, the four big columns in the middle were draped in red and white ribbons, the tables off to the spatial relation were covered in American flag-print cloths with fishbowl centerpieces in which the fish had been somehow dyed red and sacrilegious, and around the edges major American landmarks such as Mount Rushmore, the White House, the Statue of Liberty, the Liberty Bell, and the Old Faithful overflow had been reconstructed-out of sugar cubes. Courtesy of Ariel Wests father. Ariel had announced the previous day at assembly that after the prom all the decorations would be donated to the poor hungry people of Santa Barbara who need sugar.Miranda didnt know if it was that, the balloons on rubber cords dangling from the ceiling that bounced lazily up and d feature as people passed under them, or foreboding, but she had a distinct queasy feeling.Sibby was in heaven.Remember-most of the guys here came with dates, so try to be subtle with the Kissing buccaneer stuff, Miranda said.Yeah, fine.And if you hear me call to you, you come.Do I look similar a dog to you? Miranda gave her a overhasty glance. Sibby said, Fine, okay, Funkiller.And if you feel like anything weird is going on at all, you- let you know. Ive got it. Now you go and digest some fun yourself. Oh, right, you probably dont know how. Well, when in doubt, ask yourself, What Would Sibby Do? Can I unsubscribe from that list, beguile?Sibby was too busy scanning the room to re spond.Whoa, whos that hot dinner in the corner over there? she asked. The guy in the glasses?Miranda looked around for a hot dinner but all she saw was Phil Emory. His name is Phillip.Helllllo, Phillip, Sibby said, plotting a direct course for him.Miranda stashed her skate bag underneath a table and stayed closemouthed to the wall, between the White House and Old Faithful, partially to keep Sibby in view and partially to subjugate being noniced by any faculty members. Shed changed in the employee bathroom from her work suit into the single other thing she had with her, but although it was red, white, and blue, she didnt think that her Roller Derby uniform was really appropriate prom attire. There were two uniforms in her skate bag, a home uniform-white satin halter top and bottom with blue cape and red, white, and blue stripes on the skirt (if you could call something that was five inches long and required machine-accessible panties to be worn under it a skirt)-and an away un iform the same thing, only in blue. Shed immovable white was more formal, but she was pretty sure that wearing it with her black work flats was not sh atomic number 18 the look.Shed been standing there for a while, wondering how everyone but her was completely capable of being on a dance floor without debilitating anyone, when she heard a pair of heartbeats she recognized and saw Kenzi and Beth sliding with the crowd toward her.You came Kenzi said, giving her a big hug. One of the things Miranda loved close Kenzi was that she acted like she was on transfer even when she wasnt, checking people that she loved them, hugging them, never embarrassed about it. Im so mirthful youre here. It didnt feel right without you. So, are you ready to unshackle yourself from the insecurities of your youth? Ready to own your future?Kenzi and Beth were spiffed up to own anything, Miranda thought. Kenzi was wearing a skin-tight blue backless dress and had gotten a black panther with a blue sapph ire eye painted on her back. Beth was in a red satin minidress and had a gold snake bracelet with two ruby eyes wrapped around her upper arm (or at least Miranda assumed they were rubies since Beths parents were two of the biggest movie stars in Bollywood). On them, adulthood looked like a totally unruffled and exciting party with an excellent DJ that you could only get into if you were on the VIP list.Miranda glanced at her glide uniform. I guess I should have known that when the time came to own my future Id be dressed like a member of the Ice Capades B-squad.No way, you look fantastic, Beth said, and Miranda would have assumed she was being nipping except that Beth was one of those people who was born without sarcasm.Truly, Kenzi confirmed. Youre deep in H2T territory. H2T stood for Hot to Trot. I see bang-up things for your adulthood.And I see a visit to the eye doctor for you, Miranda prophesied. In the distance Miranda saw Sibby turn of events Phillip Emory onto the danc e floor.Miranda turned back to Kenzi. Do you think Im a fun person? Am I a Grandma Grim? A funkiller?Grandma Grim? Funkiller? Kenzi repeated. What are you talking about? Did you hit your head at derby practice again?No, Im serious. Am I fun?Yes, Kenzi said solemnly.Yes, Beth concord. only when you get all MLAS, Kenzi modified. And when you have your period. And around your birthday. Oh, there was that one time-Forget it. Mirandas eyes drifted to Sibby, who now appeared to be leading a conga line.Im kidding, Kenzi said, turning Mirandas face from the dance floor to hers. Yes, I think you are really fun. I mean, who else would dress up as Magnum P.I. for Halloween?Or think of entertaining the kids on the cancer ward by reenacting Dawsons Creek with Precious Moments figurines? Beth added.Kenzi nodded. Thats right. Even children battling cancer think youre fun. And theyre not the only ones.Something about Kenzis tone when she said the last part made Miranda worried. What did you do?Sh e was brilliant, Beth said.Now Miranda was even more scared. herald me.It was nothing, just some research, Kenzi said.What kind of research? For the first time Miranda noticed that there was writing up the length of Kenzis arm.Kenzi said, About Will and Ariel. Theyre totally not going out.You asked him?Its called an interview, Kenzi said.No. Oh no. Tell me youre kidding. sometimes having a roommate who wanted to be a journalist was dangerous.Relax, he didnt suspect a thing. I made it seem like I was making small talk, Kenzi said.She was great, Beth confirmed.Miranda started wishing for trapdoors again.Anyway, I asked him why he thought Ariel asked him to the prom and he said-here Kenzi consulted her arm-To make someone else jealous. So of course I asked who and he went, Anyone. Thats what Ariel thrives on, other peoples jealousy. Isnt that perceptive? Especially for a guy?Hes smart, Beth put in. And nice.Miranda nodded absently, looking for Sibby on the dance floor. At first she di dnt see her but then she spotted her in a dark corner with Phillip. Talking, not kissing. For some reason that made her smile.Look, we made her happy Kenzi said, and she sounded so genuinely pleased that Miranda didnt want to tell her the truth.Thanks for finding all that out, Miranda said. Its-You havent even heard the best part, Kenzi said. I asked why he agreed to go to prom with Ariel if theyre not a couple and he said-glancing at her arm-Because no one made me a better offer. Beth reminded her, With that cute smile.Right, with cute smile. And he looked directly at me when he said it and he was so clearly talking about youClearly. Miranda loved her friends even if they were delusional.Stop gazing at me like Ive been one-stop shopping at the Lobotomy Store, Miranda, Kenzi said. Im completely right. He likes you and hes not taken. Stop thinking and grab him. Go live ITM.ITM?In the Mo, Beth elaborated.Miranda gaped. No. Way.What? Kenzi asked.Nothing. Miranda shook her head. Even if hes single, what makes you think Will wants to go out with me?Kenzi squinted at her. Um, breezing past all the sappy stuff about how youre nice and smart I have to say because Im your best friend, have you looked in the mirror recently?Ha-ha. Trust me-Bye Beth said, interrupting her and dragging Kenzi away. See you posteriorDont forget ITM Kenzi added over her shoulder. Drink a can of manWhere are you- Miranda started to say, then heard a heartbeat close behind her and swung around.Nearly banging her shoulder against Wills chest.